Sunday, April 20, 2008

Walking the Black Dog

I have been "walking the black dog" lately. I am broke, my health is going and I see nothing better ahead. This world has no place for people without money.

I have made so many mistakes that I guess I deserve this bleak future. I never worried before because I always believed God would take care of me. Now, I fear that he does not care for the individual, only for his grand plan. Our reward must be in heaven then, not here.

Somehow, I think that there should be help for the individual. I learned when I faced our city council though that government doesn't care for the rights of the individual. I was told that directly by numerous city council assistants.

Who do we matter to, then?

Not friends. They are all afraid I will ask them for money. Not family. No one even pays attention to whether I am dead or alive. Not my church. You must have money even to attend a senior activity. It is a sin to be in need, not successful.

To God, who does not answer? I just don't understand anymore.

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